These past weeks have been so thin as to be almost transparent… a time when the transition between physical and spiritual seems as fine as a fairy breath. I’ve had the honor of sitting at the bedside of someone I loved as she passed from Earth into death (wherever that may be). Barbara Williams was an unsung hero, one of the most loving and giving people I’ve known. She welcomed me as a sister and was a second mother to my daughter, and I miss her greatly.

Death is a curious thing. In one moment, our myriad intricate organs are functioning sufficiently to keep us alive, and in the next, it all comes to a screeching halt. Suddenly we’re just husks and the spirit is gone. It’s all so ephemeral.

I used to be sure about things like reincarnation and karma. Now it seems so random. Why does such a good person have her life destroyed? She had stopped for a deer. An oncoming car did not, and flipped the animal through her windshield. No airbag in the world could have saved her.

Her precious daughter, sitting in the backseat, survived and has thrived. We could say god was watching over her daughter, but that might imply god wasn’t watching over Barb. It’s all just random.

So many devout prayers being earnestly offered each day by the faithful, the hopeful… are they payments on an insurance policy that may never be collected? Investments in a happy afterlife?